Tuesday, February 26, 2008
ok i'm just here cause Teryne asked me to update.
i'm sick. i couldnt sleep last night. for a couple of reasons. firstly, the medicine is killing me more than the illness. secondly, i'm in the worst situation you can ever think of. i got myself into the deepest waters you can ever think a councillor can ever get into, the hottest soup made in the history of councillors (i guess). my self esteem is just hitting the bottom floor and i just feel so selfish and useless to let her take all the blame. i just don't feel right and good about this. it's just unfair to her. as a student leader in school, it was my responsibility to remind ourselves to do the right things and everything. and even though i seriously cannot remember what went wrong that day, it just went wrong anyway. but she knew that it would probably affect our elections into exco, so she went to tell ms vicky that it was all her fault. for that, i just cannot bring myself to let her get it all alone. the responsibility should be shared between all of us. and not just her alone. and it probably started with me cause i probably told them some lame hilarious joke and made them laugh. if i didnt do that, nothing would have happened.
well, it doesnt really matter much to me if i don't get into exco or anything but i just don't feel that it's fair for her to take up everything. in fact, if she should get any demerits, i should get double. if she should get any detentions, i should get double. or worse still, if she loses her position in house comm, i should jolly well lose mine too. because i'm a councillor. because i failed to set that example for her. because i failed to be more cautious in taking note of our behaviour. and most importantly, because i'm her friend. i cannot let her bear the burden alone. i just don't feel right and good about this.
and i really don't know what to do.
/8:08 PM
